What queer people would say to the pope

Here is what I imagine that queer people and their friends have to say to the Roman-Catholic church. The original text was written during the consultation phase of the Synod on Synodality, but has not been discussed with anybody in Estonia because I lacked energy and time to organize any discussions, maybe because I was the only member of the Sinoditiim to consider talking with LGBT people.

Dear Holy Father,

we are often disappointed when we hear and see what many Christians say and think about homosexual people. For example the EKN position paper about homosexuality does not make us say “See how they love one another” (Tertullian) or that they “have love for one another” (John 13:35).

Many of us are really angry with the Church. This is more than unfortunate, it is a serious issue because, as you formulate it, extra ecclesiam nulla salus. We want to help the Church on her synodal journey of seeking what is good and true[1].

  • It is true that our cause happens to get misused by entertainment industry for making money.

  • It is true that we happen to be impatient or provocative.

  • We agree that sexuality is a topic that deserves delicateness. Especially children must be protected from getting answers to questions that they didn’t ask. It might be that we happen to lack prudence.

  • We acknowledge the importance of sexual polarization for the human race.

We acknowledge that the topic of queer people is a controversial question, being discussed fervently in the whole world. We acknowledge that individual humans have strong opinions and beliefs about this topic. We do not blame anybody for having a strong opinion.

We ask you to please explain to the church:

  • Queerness is an extraordinary sexual orientation or identity, not a disorder. A disorder is an attitude that hinders you from loving your brothers and sisters and disturbs your social life. Homophobia is a disorder, queerness isn’t.

  • Queer people are very welcome in the Church. They are a gift to humanity that the church has unfortunately refused to accept for a long time.

  • The Gospel does not include a condition about our marital status. Some queer people are called to live a life in celibacy. Others are called to live together as a same-sex couple, or even to found a biological family with a partner who values them so they find workarounds for their particular situation.

  • Same-sex couples make sense under civil law and are no obstacle to being a fully recognized member of the Church.

It is work in progress. The text is here and waits patiently for feedback. Feel free to contact me if you want to contribute.

Footnotes